Here I go again complaining about people congratulating me on my non-existent fetus. I promise I’ll drop it once it is no longer an issue. Really I just want to prevent women from experiencing the frustration, anger and bewilderment that I feel every time someone assumes that I am pregnant. I will also selfishly admit that I would also like to not experience these awkward moments in the future. I’ll also add that it’s tricky because I have never had someone assume that I was pregnant out of malice, most of them are really happy to congratulate me. So here are some pointers to help people direct all that joy towards the people who actually will be happy to receive it- not the mother of two who ran 3 miles earlier that day and opted to eat only half of her burrito in the spirit of portion control who is exhausted after standing in the Nordstrom’s Rack Line to buy six pairs of shoes for her two very energetics children, one of which is trying on every single pair of glasses he can get his hands on, when she had originally gone in there to purchase something nice for herself (I’m not bitter 😉 ).
3 Things to Consider:
#3-The Face Says it All:
Is the woman wearing a don’t eff with me look on her face? If she is, whether she is pregnant or not, chances are she doesn’t want you asking her if she is pregnant. We all know that society has a habit of expecting women to look happy all the time and open for discussion but yea, that needs to stop. Even when I was pregnant, when I looked exhausted or uncomfortable, there was nothing I found more irritating than people’s needs to share their observations about my appearance with me.
#2-Context Clues People!:
It works when your reading and come across a word you don’t understand and it works in social situations as well. Just take a moment to observe the woman before you open your mouth. Is the woman drinking alcohol in public? In most places in the United States, if she is, then chances are she isn’t pregnant. Is she holding a small child? If she is, then chances are she isn’t pregnant. Is she eating sushi? Just kidding, I ate sushi when I was pregnant. In all seriousness, context clues seem simple but you would be surprised…
#1-The Golden Rule:
If you have to ask, then you shouldn’t ask. I’ve been there people, don’t get me wrong, I too once was a pregnant belly assumptionist but I have learned that if I find myself squinting at said suspected pregnant woman then I should probably keep my mouth closed. So I do until I receive additional information.
Am I alone here? Feel free to share your experience as either the assumed pregnant woman or the pregnant belly assumptionist. The more we share the greater chances less women will fall victim to yet another awkward moment.